Lost and Found
by Rustic Diamond
Summary: He finally listened to her. But was it what she truly wanted?


**Lost  
**By RusticDiamond

_Disclaimer : I don't own Harry Potter... J.K. Rowling does..._

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"Why do you care so much?" Hermione yelled. She was frustrated. Ron kept bugging her about what was wrong – nothing was wrong. She could take care of herself, but he didn't seem to understand.

"I care because I'm your friend!" '_that's all you'll let me be_' Ron Weasley shot back at her. How could she not know how every single time she's in pain, he wanted to die?

"There's nothing wrong! Get that through your head! Oh, get this too – I am not a little girl! I can take care of myself!" Fuming, Hermione stepped out of the Gryffindor common room, running to her dormitory. She hoped that Ron wouldn't follow her, as she couldn't deal with it. Not right now.

In the common room, Ron was still standing there. Though he was fuming, he tried to control himself. A hand was placed on his shoulder. He turned around and was faced with caring emerald eyes. The eyes shone with understanding, and the two went to Harry's dorm. Once they reached his dorm room, Ron's suppressed anger rushed out.

"How could she say that? We all know how she doesn't take care of herself! She doesn't eat half the time because she's so carried away by schoolwork! How can I NOT be worried about her? I mean, I…"

"You what?" Harry prompted. He knew what Ron was going to say. He just wanted him to admit it to himself.

"I… I love her, dammit! I love her and she treats me like dirt. I'm second rate in her eyes." Ron's voice faltered. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes. He couldn't control them, just like how he couldn't control himself from falling for one of his best friends.

"Ron…" Harry was shocked at how Ron was acting after the confession. He expected anger and rage, but never tears…

"I've had enough, Harry. She's always telling me what to do. I'll listen to her for once. I won't care anymore." Ron bit out. Harry looked over at this friend. Ron's face was contorted with pain and unshed tears.

"She never said that-"

"But she implied it. And that's enough for me. Thank you, Harry, for listening to me." With that, Ron went out of the dorm room. Harry stayed seated on his bed. He didn't want to see his two best friends in pain, and at this rate, that's where they're headed, and he couldn't do anything to stop them. He climbed under his covers, shut the hangings, and tried to hold back the tears.

Ron climbed up the stairs that led him to the Heads dormitory. Tonight, the walk seemed endless, and he dreaded climbing the last step. Being in his dormitory meant that Hermione was sleeping on the other side of the wall. The Head Girl and Head Boy rooms were next to each other, and they weren't as soundproof as others thought. He could hear every single thing that went on next door. After everything that has happened in their last six years of being in Hogwarts, Hermione had recurring nightmares. Every night, when she cried out, Ron would leap out of bed, knock on her door, and see if she was ok. He had to go see if she was alright – he couldn't bear it if something happened to her. These were the only times where he wouldn't be the unwakeable Ron Weasley that he normally is. He responds to her voice, just like how his wand responds to him. He stepped onto the landing at the end of the stairs, and he looked over to her dormitory door. Instead of its usual position of being slightly ajar, the door was tightly shut. Ron winced at the sight. '_She doesn't want me in her life anymore – tightly shut out, that's what I am.'_ Holding his tears, he ran into his room. Slamming it closed, he fell onto the bed, hugged his pillow, and cried himself to sleep.

_Leafless trees and endless amounts of snow surrounded her. She felt cold. Very cold. She looked around, and saw a lifeless body not five metres from her._

"_Ron!" _

_She ran over, not wanting to believe that Ron was the one lying on the bed of snow. Reaching the body, she found a dagger impaled in his chest. One of his hands clutched the scabbard, its jewels glinting in the moonlight. His face was not one of peace. Instead, it was one of pain and suffering._

_No! This couldn't be happening… no! NO! Ron was not supposed to be dead, he was supposed to be alive! They just had a row earlier this evening! No!_

"NO!!!!!!" A scream came out of Hermione's throat. It couldn't be happening. The nightmares had plagued her for a long time, but this one was too real. It was too real. She broke into sobs, not being able to handle the nightmare. Hugging her knees to her chest, she couldn't stop the image of Ron's body from flashing in her mind. She couldn't bear to lose him. She loved him with all her heart. The thought that Ron would be taken away from her caused another wave of tears to fall down her cheeks.

In the midst of her tears, she felt that something wasn't right. She realized that Ron wasn't knocking at her door, like he usually did. She thought back to their row earlier this evening, and realized that he was, for once, doing what she told him to do endless times. He stopped caring. '_I've lost him. I pushed him too far, and now I've lost him. I've lost him.'_ Nothing could stop the heart-wrench pain that gripped her. She had lost his love, and she knew that she would never have it again.

"NO!!!!!!"

Ron shot up from his curled position. He knew that voice – Hermione. He jumped out of bed, threw open the door, and had one foot out of his room before he remembered.

She didn't want him to care anymore.

That thought caused pain to flood his system. He withdrew his foot, closed the door, and tried to shut himself out from her cries. His face bore a mask of pain. With every single sob that came through the walls, another tear fell from his eyes. He couldn't stop her pain. Time after time, he ran to the door, and time after time, he ran away from the door as if it was burning. He had to stop himself from going to the door. To Her. He paced around his room, as if willing for the cries to stop. When they didn't he went to the wall that separated the two rooms, pressing his whole body against the wall. This was the closest that he could get to her. He wanted to be on the other side of the wall. To hold her and chase her demons away. He couldn't, though – she wouldn't let him. Tears streamed down his face, as he was torn between his love for her and what she wanted him to do. With every cry she made, the vice around his heart tightened. He fell onto his knees, unable to take it, and joined her in her pain.


End file.
